the title of this entry begs the question, why?
i dont think i ask myself that question enough. why am i not sleeping? it stands to reason that i should be. I have to be up at 6am to be in the office by 8am. I have early appointments, and have a big day ahead of me. none of which is going to be enjoiable, or relaxing, or easy for that matter... i need to sleep.
but for some reason i just can't shut off my thoughts...
whether it be thoughts of people, situation, money, or relationship, it doesn't matter, i'm thinking about it.
it wasn't always like this. i used to sleep. i used to dream. there was a time when i just let life live itself.
not anymore. i am old, i need to be more responsible, i need to have direction and purpose. i'm 22.
wait, i'm 22? why do i need all of this?
anyone who knows me, knows this is not me.
life has a tendency of giving you little reminders of what you should be doing. i was given a little reminder recently, and i am listening.
last night i laid my head on my pillow closed my eyes and fell asleep for the first time in 6 months. no thinking, no wondering, no worrying. it was how i used to live and love. it was me.
finally i can sleep agian.
i'm finally asleep.
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